What Will They Ban Next ? First it was Trousers Now its Skirts.

If you met this young person on her way to school you may think how good to see some one smartly dressed. A bit traditional you might say but better than some school outfits you can see in most towns these days. You would therefore be amazed to learn she was in fact on her way home after being dismissed for flouting the schools "trousers only" dress code. No wonder Sharna Griffin's parents are annoyed especially as they took steps to explain why their daughter wore a skirt to school. Earlier this year trousers were banned by another school for being too tight. You would think there could be a more sensible approach to dress codes in schools but, as ever the rule makers dig in and defend their decisions regardless of peoples circumstances.

So Sharna has had two days off so far ! How much longer …who knows and what will they ban next? Watch this space.

Funny What Makes Me Grumpy

It has been some time since I felt grumpy enough to vent my annoyance at anything. In the interim we have had riots in London and elsewhere, the Arab Spring has sprung and despots like Gaddaffi and Mubarak to name but two have been ousted. This little bit of bizzarre "art" however managed to annoy me enough to seek an outlet. These fake animals fooled museum visitors in Victorian times but made me wonder yet again at the never ending abuse of dead animals for gain. The museum where they were exhibited has closed (wonder why) but the collection was being auctioned off including the only Yeti ever captured. Who buys this type of stuff?

Probably the same type of folk who loot shops?

Grumpies of The World Unite. Where Right is Wrong and Wrong is Right.

I normally cannot be bothered with those chain e-mail things that go around but once in a while one comes around and makes you chuckle but also makes you think a bit. This one (author unknown) is just such a one. Its a wee bit like when you were a kid and did'nt know why your Dad didn't rule the world because he had the answer to everything and could also fix your bike. I particularly like the pensioner/prisoner swap idea, it has real appeal. So re created here with a nod to the originator Grumpies of the World Unite…

Dear Mr. Cameron,
Please find below our suggestion for fixing England 's economy.
Instead of giving billions of pounds to banks that will squander the money
on lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following plan..
You can call it the Patriotic Retirement Plan:
There are about 10 million people over 50 in the work force.
Pay them £1 million each severance for early retirement with the following
stipulations:
1) They MUST retire.
Ten million job openings – unemployment fixed
2) They MUST buy a new British car.
Ten million cars ordered – Car Industry fixed
3) They MUST either buy a house or pay off their mortgage -
Housing Crisis fixed
4) They MUST send their kids to school/college/university -
Crime rate fixed
5) They MUST buy £100 WORTH of alcohol/tobacco a week …..
and there's your money back in duty/tax etc
6) Instead of stuffing around with the carbon emissions trading scheme that
makes us pay for the major polluters, tell the greedy so and so's to reduce
their pollution emissions by 75% within 5 years or we shut them down.
It can't get any easier than that!
P.S. If more money is needed, have all members of parliament pay back their
falsely claimed expenses and second home allowances
If you think this would work, please forward to everyone you know.
If not, please disregard.
Grumpies of the World Unite
Also………..
Let's put the pensioners in jail and the criminals in a nursing home.
This way the pensioners would have access to showers, hobbies and walks.
They'd receive unlimited free prescriptions, dental and medical treatment,
wheel chairs etc and they'd receive money instead of paying it out.
They would have constant video monitoring, so they could be helped
instantly, if they fell, or needed assistance.
Bedding would be washed twice a week, and all clothing would be ironed and
returned to them.
A guard would check on them every 20 minutes and bring their meals and
snacks to their cell.
They would have family visits in a suite built for that purpose.
They would have access to a library, weight room, spiritual counseling,
pool and education.
Simple clothing, shoes, slippers, PJ's and legal aid would be free, on
request.
Private, secure rooms for all, with an exercise outdoor yard, with gardens.
Each senior could have a PC a TV radio and daily phone calls.
There would be a board of directors to hear complaints, and the guards
would have a code of conduct that would be strictly adhered to.

The criminals would get cold food, be left all alone and unsupervised.
Lights off at 8pm, and showers once a week. Live in a tiny room and pay
£600.00 per week and have no hope of ever getting out.
Think about this (more points of contention):
————————————————————————
COWS
Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that during the mad cow
epidemic our government could track a single cow, born in Appleby almost
three years ago, right to the stall where she slept in the county of
Cumbria?
And, they even tracked her calves to their stalls. But they are unable to
locate 125,000 illegal immigrants wandering around our country. Maybe we
should give each of them a cow.
————————————————————————
THE BRITISH CONSTITUTION They keep talking about drafting a Constitution
for Iraq … Why don't we just give them ours?
It was drawn up by a lot of really smart guys, it has worked for centuries
and we're not using it anymore.
————————————————————————
THE 10 COMMANDMENTS
The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments posted in a
courthouse or Parliament, is this -
You cannot post Thou Shalt Not Steal', 'Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery'
and 'Thou Shall Not Lie' in a building full of lawyers, judges and
politicians….. It creates a hostile work environment.
————————————————————————
Also;
Think about this …. If you don't want to forward this for fear of
offending someone — YOU ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM! It is time for us grumpy
old folk of Britain to speak up!

So some pearls of wisdom here for the law makers and law breakers.I woder if Mr Cameron has seen it?

Facebook & Twitter Face Gag Order… How Will That Work?

A UK court has ruled that social network sites like Facebook and Twitter cannot publish users' comments which name or reveal the identities of people involved in certain legal proceedings. To me this shows a basic lack of understanding about what social networking is about. How do you stop people talking over the garden fence, or in the bus que, or after work down at the pub. You see no matter how many super injunctions you have in place people will still talk. What I wonder from it all is what do these super rich celebs and the like have to hide? They obviously fear something so, to my way of thinking the net result is a heightened interest in what it is they want to hide in the first place. The main difficulty of course is that most of the major players are American owned and operated and the USA just loves to defend the right to freedom of speech. I think its called The First Amendment. As Mrs Grumpy always says talk is cheap until you talk to a lawyer. With thousands of sites and millions of users I guess they will need lots of lawyers to enforce this particular rule.

Eurovision Never Fails to Disappoint and 2011 Even More So.

As always we had our usual family forum watching the Eurovision Show. I really don't want to refer to it as a song contest because, in my opinion, it stopped being that a long, long time ago! Azerbaijan as the winner, we thought, were pretty poor, a throwback to who knows when, with a song called Running Scared which certainly scared me! For my money the best effort was by Austria who also won our family vote (I mark the scoreboard). The Irish entry by the most annoying twins on the planet, was a creepy reminder of Gary Glitter, and the UK song by Blue was a typical boy band anthemic effort which failed to shine. Just for the record, our winners were Austria followed by Hungary with Finland third. The best bit of the whole extravaganza was the outfits some of the performers wear, I mean Moldova with the pointy hats, what was that all about?

Sony Security and the 70 Million Pay Day.

I have always been a big fan of Sony products whether it's a TV, Hi-Fi or laptops, but I never got into the on-line gaming thing.

Just as well I think, as I read about the potential 70 million Playstation members who could now be at risk, although Sony say there is no evidence to support this.

The first you will know of this of course is when you get a call from your bank or credit card company wondering if you are in the process of spending £1000 or so on a computer in Nigeria.

That's where I get angry at these companies, although experts agree it would be very difficult to defeat an attack of this scale I believe it is how you deal with the after effects that really matter. Would it not be better to get an alert from someone which would give you the chance to minimise the risk? Has anyone been contacted by Sony Customer Services? I don't think so unless you know differently? Interestingly Sony are recruiting security analysts?

Bin Laden Conspiracy Theories Abound.

As the conspiracy theorists have a field day on the Bin Laden story you must ask yourself if the answer is to release the head cam footage of the event?

It's incredible enough that he was "hiding in plain view" but for Pakistan to deny all knowledge takes a lot of believing.

As The White House change and adjust the story it leads to further speculation. In a strange way the world is a less safe place as speculation increases as to what happens next.

It's reported he lived in the house for almost six years and it was raided on more than one occasion to no avail. Should it be knocked down or should they leave it standing as the last hiding place of the man who terrorised so many?

Where’s Tupperware gone?

I do a bit of cooking now and then and along with Mrs Grumpy I'm a sucker for kitchen gadgets as regular readers may know.

One of our prized gadgets is an orange peeler which is at least 30 years old. We also have the odd airtight canister and various other bowls and things of similar age, all made by Tupperware.

Now in recent times we've acquired a variety of plastic containers with no lids, lids that don't fit properly and various imitations of Tupperware. Nothing comes close to Tupperware so why can't you buy it?

There used to be Tupperware Parties in homes every other week but it seems difficult to find now, so, if anyone knows where Tupperware has gone please let us know.

Burqa Ban Leads To First Arrests in France.

It comes as no surprise that France has made arrests as it attempts to enforce its newly passed law on the wearing of veils in public. I have some dilemma with the issue as it is not so very long ago that the kilt was banned in Scotland and ultimately these laws infringe on peoples free will. On the other hand visitors to muslim countries must obey the dress code there, and there lies the dilemma. It will be interesting to follow developments, but as Belgium, Switzerland and The Netherlands consider similar laws more protests are sure to follow.

Spring has sprung a hole in my wallet.

We have always been fond of a wander around a garden centre. They used to be called nurseries, where a grumpy old man with a flat cap and wearing tweed trousers and a Tattersall check shirt gave expert advice on how to grow almost anything in an almost begruding manner. You could only buy plants, seeds or compost there. If you wanted rakes and spades and lawnmowers you went to a hardware store where another knowledgeable expert would impart first class advice on all such garden tools. You can imagine our anticipation therefore when we paid our first visit to our brand new local Garden Super Centre. As we entered there was not a plant in sight as we made our way through the furniture, barbecue ,clothing, footwear, books, aquatic and tool departments. On through the wine and liquor shop through the kitchen department and the food hall past the deli emerging via the in store bakery at the licensed restuarant we found the plants. It was without doubt the biggest collection of quality plants at eye watering prices we have ever seen. After much searching we eventually asked an "advisor" where the herb selection might be found when he advised brightly "aisle 17 sir" the penny dropped TESCO have moved into the garden centre business big time. We thouroughly enjoyed this new experience and I'm so pleased we went otherwise I may never have known we needed a ceramic bird bath.